Love

He’s Broke, Should I Stay?

Financial compatibility is critical to sustaining a successful relationship. According to a survey of 191 CDFA professionals from North America, one of the three leading causes of divorce is financial problems.

 Fiscal mismanagement has the capacity to financially bankrupt a couple, erode trust, engender bitterness and discord in the household and eventually lead to separation. In light of the foregoing we will explore whether or not there is ever a reason to remain in a relationship with a broke partner?

 

  1. He Is A Big Spender

This is the man that lives lavishly, spends generously and wastes wantonly. He has no savings, very few assets and is often heavily indebted. Often a man who falls into this category, after having exhausted his income, will resort to borrowing to finance his lifestyle, plunging him into greater debt.

This behaviour often originates from deep seated underlined issues that have not been addressed. A woman caught in the orbit of this chaos may feel compelled to salvage the relationship whilst simultaneously feeling overwhelmed.

It is imperative that the “big spender” receives professional assistance and learns to budget and alter his spending habits if the relationship is to remain viable.

 

  1. He Has Potential

A woman may find herself immersed in a relationship with a man that is full of potential but is barely eking out an income from the pursuit of his craft. In order to genuinely know whether his aspirations will be fruitful a woman has to focus on his actions.

A man may be a great lyricist and assure you that one day he will become the next Lil Wayne, but if he is not actively writing and seeking ways to market himself, his professions of future greatness are nothing more than delusions of grandeur.

Dating a dreamer is completely feasible as long as those dreams are coupled with dedication, discipline and hard work.

 

  1. He Lives At Home 

Often a woman may find a man who lives at home with his parents off -putting. The sense of excitement that may be derived in the initial stages may be diminished if a woman is forced to go back to his parents every time she feels like dropping by.

This situation however is not a guaranteed deal -breaker and the more poignant issue is his motive for living with his folks. If he is saving to purchase a home or he recently separated and is readjusting to the single life, these are perfectly acceptable scenarios where you should not feel discouraged by dating a man who lives at home.

 

  1. He Can’t Commit To A Job

A man may find it difficult to commit to a job. If he flits from job to job without any clear sense of direction it may be because he feels un-motivated, not sufficiently challenged or he is on a quest to find his niche. Many successful men have been the holders of several jobs until they found their proverbial “calling.”

Notwithstanding a man’s quest for fulfilment he cannot ignore his financial responsibilities .The fact is a man has to ensure that he possesses financial stability to meet his obligations and provide for his dependents. More importantly a man should be cognizant of the emotional toll his financial burdens may have of his partner.

In this scenario the man needs to be made to understand that whilst the pursuit of one’s dreams is not discouraged he still has to have a stable income to contribute to the household expenses.

 

  1. He’s Lazy

Being in a relationship with a man that lacks adequate drive can feel intensely frustrating to an ambitious woman. A woman’s long term goals such as the acquisition of a home may seem elusive if her partner is unable to lend any tangible financial assistance.

If a man is unwilling to take up the mantle and adjust his attitude toward work it is best a woman severs ties as this is one relationship that is destined to fail.

            

  1. He Does Not Earn Enough 

There are many women who will regard a man less if he does not fall within a certain income bracket. The man’s inability to provide sufficiently may lead to the woman’s resentment towards him. He may not be able to cater to her whims and fancies but if he is stable, committed to relationship and in all other respects a good partner, he should not be discredited as an ideal partner.

The dynamics of relationships have changed significantly over-time and the role of main breadwinner does not exclusively fall within the man’s purview. He may contribute by doing chores or assisting with the kids. A man’s value to relationship should not be solely measured by his financial contribution to the household.

Invariably when it comes to relationships there is no “one size fits all” approach. A couple has to determine what is best for them based on their unique circumstances and realities.